Okay everybody, circle up!
No pushing, no chewing on the crayons — this is serious business.
I have…
a plan.
See, the grown-ups think they run the daycare. They think we just nap, snack, and stack.
But I’ve been watching.
The secret to power isn’t toys. It’s systems.
Systems that run even when we’re in time-out.
Step one of world (or daycare) domination:
We control the snacks.
You don’t need to touch the Goldfish. You just need to know who touches the Goldfish.
We build relationships with the snack distributors — that’s Liam’s mom on Tuesdays and the kid with the cool Paw Patrol lunchbox.
We trade. We leverage. We scale.
Pretty soon, if anyone wants a Cheerio, they come to us.
Congratulations, you’ve just built an affiliate network.
Next: Automation.
You can’t run an empire if you’re awake all day — we need systems that work while we nap.
Here’s how it goes:
Tommy guards the snack stash.
Emma handles toy negotiations.
I manage communications through finger paint messages on the wall.
When I nap, everything keeps running. When I drool, the empire still grows.
That’s called scalability, babies.
Every great leader needs a media strategy.
We make content.
Pictures. Scribbles. Epic block towers that say, “We are unstoppable.”
Each drawing goes on the wall — that’s branding.
Each tantrum gets attention — that’s marketing.
Each whispered rumor about “who got extra animal crackers” — that’s virality.
The teachers think we’re “expressing ourselves.”
We’re building influence.
Listen, you can’t just keep remaking the same tower every day.
You build one big one, take a picture, and show it to everyone.
That’s content repurposing.
You cry once, loudly, and the grown-ups remember forever.
That’s brand awareness.
Never waste a tantrum.
If you want to rule the daycare, you can’t do everything yourself.
You need a team.
Maddie handles naps.
Noah runs block logistics.
I oversee juice distribution (high-risk operation).
Each person has a task. Each task builds the empire.
You get freedom when everyone else is busy doing your work for you.
That’s not bossy — that’s leadership.
Every afternoon, I observe.
I measure.
How many cookies did we acquire?
How many toys did we trade?
How many cries got us what we wanted?
That’s data.
You can’t improve your tantrums if you don’t track your tantrums.
Knowledge is power. Power is snacks.
Now listen closely. This is important.
Naptime isn’t wasted time — it’s passive growth.
While we rest, the teachers tidy up our mess, refill the snack bins, and reset the room.
We wake up refreshed, and the resources have replenished.
The system keeps working while we sleep.
That’s passive income, baby.
There will always be rivals.
The Big Kids from Room B think they run the hall.
They’ve got better shoes and fancier snacks, but we’ve got something they don’t:
Organization.
While they argue about who gets the dinosaur toy, we’ll have already automated our cookie supply chain.
They’ll never see us coming.
Here’s how we win forever:
Snack →
Energy →
Building →
Applause →
More snacks.
That’s the flywheel.
We just keep spinning.
Even when the grown-ups rotate the toys or switch up snack time, the system stays strong.
Because this isn’t just daycare anymore.
This is infrastructure.
We don’t need to “grow up.”
We need to scale up.
We don’t sell toys. We sell ideas.
We don’t cry for attention. We cry for leverage.
We don’t play the game. We redesign it — with blocks and ambition.
You can call us “Nobody New,”
but soon everyone in this daycare will know our name.
When the grown-ups ask, “Who did this?”
we’ll just shrug and say, “Nobody.”
But we’ll know.
The snacks will flow, the toys will trade, the walls will be ours.
And when nap time hits, the systems will keep running — quietly, perfectly.
The teachers will think peace has returned.
They have no idea.
Final Words from the Founder:
“Build once. Share snacks forever.
Cry with purpose. Nap with power.
Scale the daycare.”
— Nobody New, Age 3½